So the day before yesterday, my humans were at the dining table and I had snuck into my usual cosy corner next to it – my way to being a part of the family meals – when dad announced that some guy called Modi had banned something called 500 and 1,000 rupee notes.
‘Don’t believe everything that’s circulated on social media,’ mama commented rather condescendingly. Not so long after, her phone beeped and she nearly shrieked, ‘hell yes, he has banned those currency denominations!’ And what followed was hectic activity around the house. Everyone was tapping intensely on their phones, someone ran to switch on the TV and pressed the remote harder than usual in an attempt to get to some news channel quickly. I had no idea what the hell was up, but I too walked from room to room urgently, trying to pretend I gave a shit about whatever it was that had sent my humans into this sudden state of frenzy.
After sometime my peeps settled down in front of the TV, I too entered the room and sat next to the bean bag (my favourite spot in the bedroom, yeah). Since everyone was looking at the TV screen so intently, I decided to follow their lead. Now people, my vision isn’t exactly like yours. I see things through a prism of black and white haze, something like that x-ray image you folks get when you are not feeling too well (yeah, I know about it cuz my humans put me through that too!). So, I saw this guy, a little stout, half-balding and sporting a beard, using some words like corruption, fake currencies and some such, telling my humans why these note things will no longer be useful to them.
This was followed by a heated discussion, with half the humans in the house calling this TV guy’s move a smart one, while others saying it was just another gimmick that looked good on paper but won’t have any real consequences. This went on for a while. Then, my mama’s dad called to tell her that upon hearing the news her mom had fished out as many as 45 of these note things for an exchange. It was apparently a funny thing, because my mama couldn’t stop laughing and I could hear her dad in splits on the other end of the line. I think it is unfair though. Mama’s mom puts in some serious effort to build these little stashes of these note things and then some guy on TV says something and bam!, she has to dish out her little fortune to have it exchanged.
I remember how she had to get a fat bundle of these notes exchanged in the past cuz the TV guy said that currency older than a certain time period will no longer be accepted. Her secret stash of cash is a matter of some kind of an ongoing family joke which I just don’t get. After mama was done laughing, it occurred to her that she too had her share of those note things to worry about, so wallets were brought out and these pieces of paper counted.
Mama seemed really worried that she had only Rs 160 worth of usable currency left, the rest had suddenly become redundant. She kept saying how the hell were we going to buy groceries – milk, veggies and blah blah I lost her at veggies, but the thought of not having milk in the house worried me too. Does that mean I’ll have to go without breakfast? And what about our baby human? She kind of loses it if she doesn’t get her share of milk whenever she wakes up from sleep. Dude, I just hope they can keep the milk coming though cuz I just can’t handle all those wailing sounds. My ears hear things at an inflated decibel level and all, and those baby cries really hit where it hits the most.
By the way, what is the big deal about these note things? What do you humans use them for? Mama hasn’t really bothered telling me.